Results 1 to 14 of 14
  1. #1
    Member bigfishingstud's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Iola ks
    Posts
    67,181

    Anger Management



    I was sitting at my desk when I remembered
    a phone call I'd forgotten to make.

    I found the number and dialed it.

    A man answered, saying
    'Hello.'

    I politely said,
    'This is Chris.
    Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?'

    Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear
    'Get the right f***ing number!'
    and the phone was slammed down on me.

    I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.

    When I tracked down Robyn 's correct number to call her,
    I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.

    After hanging up with her,
    I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.

    When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled
    'You're an (edit)!'
    and hung up.

    I wrote his number down with the word '(edit)' next to it,
    and put it in my desk drawer.

    Every couple of weeks,
    when I was paying bills or had a really bad day,
    I'd call him up and yell,
    'You're an (edit)!'

    It always cheered me up.

    When Caller ID was introduced,
    I thought my theraputic '(edit)'
    calling would have to stop.

    So, I called his number and said,
    'Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company.
    I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?'

    He yelled
    'NO!'
    and slammed down the phone.

    I quickly called him back and said,
    'That's because you're an (edit)!'
    and hung up.

    One day I was at the store,
    getting ready to pull into a parking Spot.

    Some guy in a black BMW
    cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for.

    I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot,
    but the idiot ignored me.

    I noticed a 'For Sale ' sign in his back window,
    so I wrote down his number.

    A couple of days later,
    right after calling the first (edit)
    (I had his number on speed dial,)
    I thought that I'd better call the BMW (edit), too.

    I said,
    'Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?'

    He said,
    'Yes, it is.'

    I then asked,
    'Can you tell me where I can see it?'

    He said,
    'Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax ..
    It's a yellow ranch style house and the car's parked right out in front.'

    I asked,
    'What's your name?'

    He said,
    'My name is Don Hansen,'

    I asked,
    'When's a good time to catch you, Don?'

    He said,
    'I'm home every evening after five.'

    I said,
    'Listen, Don, can I tell you something?'

    He said,
    'Yes?'

    I said,
    'Don, you're an (edit)!'

    Then I hung up,
    and added his number to my speed dial, too.

    Now, when I had a problem,
    I had two (edit) to call.

    Then I came up with an idea...

    I called (edit) #1.

    He said,
    'Hello.'

    I said,
    'You're an (edit)!'
    (But I didn't hang up.)

    He asked,
    'Are you still there?'

    I said,
    'Yeah!'

    He screamed,
    'Stop calling me,'

    I said,
    'Make me,'

    He asked,
    'Who are you?'

    I said,
    'My name is Don Hansen.'

    He said,
    'Yeah? Where do you live?'

    I said,
    '(edit), I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax ,
    a yellow ranch style home and
    I have a black Beamer parked in front.'

    He said,
    'I'm coming over right now, Don.
    And you had better start saying your prayers.'

    I said,
    'Yeah, like I'm really scared, (edit),'
    and hung up.

    Then I called (edit) #2.

    He said,
    'Hello?'

    I said,
    'Hello, (edit),'

    He yelled,
    'If I ever find out who you are...'

    I said,
    'You'll what?'

    He exclaimed,
    'I'll kick your ass,'

    I answered,
    'Well, (edit), here's your chance.
    I'm coming over right now.'

    Then I hung up and immediately called the police,
    saying that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax ,
    and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.

    Then I called Channel 7 News
    about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd in Fairfax ..

    I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax ..

    I got there just in time to watch two (edit)
    beating the crap out of each other
    in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter
    and surrounded by a news crew.

    Now I feel much better.



    Isn't anger management just great!!!!!


  2. Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Hutchinson,KS
    Posts
    7,812
    #2

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)


  3. bdodd2007@yahoo.com
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Wichita , Ks
    Posts
    1,178
    #3

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)


  4. Member War Eagle1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Junction City, KS
    Posts
    15,737
    #4

    Re: Anger Management (John Br.)


  5. Member PII Magnum's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Humboldt KS
    Posts
    30,899
    #5

    Re: Anger Management (War Eagle1)

    Cheaper to keep a kid in tourney fishing than paying attorneys to keep them out of jail !!

  6. Banned
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Camdenton,Mo
    Posts
    1,706
    #6

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)


  7. Monitor hunt22-250's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NE
    Posts
    23,030
    #7

    Re: Anger Management (FlippinUpwin)


  8. Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Stilwell, KS
    Posts
    5,217
    #8

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)



    If only I was that creative!

  9. Moderator Vexus Boats sclark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Flippin Arkansas
    Posts
    13,596
    #9

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)

    That one never gets old



    "Success is never owned, it is rented, and the rent is due every day."

  10. Larry Stoafer
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Leavenworth, Ks
    Posts
    3,207
    #10

    Re: Anger Management (sclark)




  11. Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    43,706
    #11

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)


  12. grand bassin Mike.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Coffeyville, KS
    Posts
    8,807
    #12

    Re: Anger Management (tritonryan)

    Z521 Ranger - 250 Pro XS
    374V Ranger - 175 Merc Black Max


  13. Kansas Bass Club Moderator
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Topeka KS
    Posts
    15,797
    #14

    Re: Anger Management (bigfishingstud)


Similar Threads

  1. Power management
    By kprice52001 in forum Novice Boaters Forum
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 11-26-2011, 02:43 AM
  2. Lake Management
    By bass boss in forum North Carolina Fishing
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 12-17-2009, 05:33 PM
  3. Management
    By Chad in forum The Hunting & Gun Lodge
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 11-16-2008, 09:13 AM
  4. Management Solutions
    By Tagg007 in forum Kansas Fishing
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 01-23-2008, 05:41 AM