Thread: Obituary

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  1. #1
    Losing fish by the pound. CDN Bass's Avatar
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    Obituary

    Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
    - Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
    - Why the early bird gets the worm;
    - Life isn't always fair;
    - and maybe it was my fault.

    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

    It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

    Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

    Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

    Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

    Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

    He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
    I Know My Rights
    I Want It Now
    Someone Else Is To Blame
    I'm A Victim

    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
    Maple syrup... I put that sh*t on everything!
    '09 Stratos 201 XL EVO DC | 250 Pro XS | Razor 4 25P | 6" JP | 10' Talons Gen 2 | 112# Ultrex | Lowrance C12 x 4 | AT | '16 RAM Rebel

  2. Member
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    #2
    Very true

  3. Banned
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    #3
    He'll be missed!

  4. Member
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    #4
    Truth right there.

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    #5
    Were you and he close?

  6. Go Cubs Go cubswin's Avatar
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    #6
    That bastard died the first time before I was born (1970).

  7. Losing fish by the pound. CDN Bass's Avatar
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by BigFishSteve View Post
    Were you and he close?
    Yes. I miss him.

    I'm his cousin, Logic.
    Last edited by CDN Bass; 11-16-2021 at 11:29 AM.
    Maple syrup... I put that sh*t on everything!
    '09 Stratos 201 XL EVO DC | 250 Pro XS | Razor 4 25P | 6" JP | 10' Talons Gen 2 | 112# Ultrex | Lowrance C12 x 4 | AT | '16 RAM Rebel

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    #8

  9. Member
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    #9
    Yup.

  10. Member
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    #10

  11. Member RipRapRanger's Avatar
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    #11
    Sorry for out loss

  12. Member
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    #12
    I thought Common Sense past many years ago.

  13. BOOMER SOONER OkieBud's Avatar
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    #13

  14. triton
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    #14
    True Words ........

    CARL MAYER
    SKEETER FX20 2016
    BARRYVILLE NY 12719

    2023 FORD RAPTOR


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    #15
    Triton 2003 TR21
    2010 225 HO E-TEC
    HHBC

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    #16
    Yeah and we all attended it’s funeral and didn’t realize it. Should have done CPR.

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    #17
    Bravo!

  18. Member
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    #18
    Yep.
    Problem is, 'his' ... "candle burned out long before" ... I had the pleasure.
    Do not take your half in the middle ....

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    #19
    Great post! I shared it on my FB page. Thank you.