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Snippets
I lived in a houseboat for a while, and started seeing the girl next door.
Eventually we drifted apart.
My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic.
I refused. If I'm going to have sex, it is going to be on my own Accord.
A man tried to sell me a coffin today.
I told him, that's the last thing I need.
The neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs.
We had been his customers for 8 years. We had no idea he was a barber.
100 years ago everyone had a horse and only the rich had cars. Nowadays
everyone has a car and only the rich have horses.
Oh how the stables have turned.
My boyfriend was dying. I was by his bedside when he said something with
a weak voice, "There's something I must confess."
"Shhh" I said "There's nothing to confess. Everything is alright."
"No, I must die in peace" he said, "I had sex with your sister, your best friend and your co-worker"
"I know" I whispered, "That's why I poisoned you... Now close your eyes."
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Ranger Boats Moderator
I can see Rodney Dangerfield telling these. Right up his alley.
John Clark — Findlay, Ohio
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