Raising kids

[Mark Perry]

A couple of comments lately in other threads about raising kids. Not sure if we did it right but of the 4 we have raised we have few if any complaints on them. They all seem to work hard and are good people. Saw this today and it really shows the way we are/were as parents. Not sure I would have referred to them as rules but we pretty well followed most if not all of this when they were growing up. They are all grown now but we are still parents.

Rules for raising kids.
1. Never lie to them. They are smart as hell and need truth more than protection.
2. Tell them you love them every day.
3. Hug and kiss them frequently. If they never receive physical affection they won’t know how to give it or handle it.
4. Let them get hurt. Pain is an invaluable teacher. They will only touch a hot stove once.
5. Let them solve their own fights. When they run to you to solve the issue say “solve the problem” and stand back.
6. Teach them about money, cash flow, business and economics. School isn’t, this knowledge is 100% up to you.
7. Get them a dog.
8. Teach them to survive. Teach them to hunt, fish, build a shelter, start a fire, grow food, and find clean water.
9. Teach them manners. Please and thank you, yes sir, yes ma’am should never be encouraged but expected. If you have no manners, neither will they.
10. Give them all of you. Let them see you cry. Let them see you rage. Never hide your feelings or emotions from them.
11. Build a relationship with them. They deserve more than your clients, golf buddies or girlfriends. Ask them questions. Find out what they love, ask them what they fear. Actively be investing in a relationship with them.
12. Be in their world. If they like video games, play video games with them. If they like sports, play sports with them. Do things THEY want to do even if it’s not your cup of tea.
13. Date them at least monthly. Men take the boys out for guys night and your daughters out for daddy daughter dates. Be 100% present with them.
14. Discipline with intention. Discipline them but teach them the lesson after. Always hug and kiss them and tell them you love them after you discipline.
15. Let them be a kid. They are nerdy, stinky, emotional creatures. Don’t try and make them a smaller version of you, let them be a kid.

[JosieRay]

I don't have kids, but I agree with everything you said.

[201 Stratos]

[grandbassslayer]

[spinningreel]

My boy is 17, we’re not the huggy mushy type, but we know how we feel just don’t say it much.

I try to teach him the things nobody told me but that I wish they would have. Help prepare him to be independent and be able to stand on his own.

[Sokyangler]

Great list. I have a three year old and am amazed by how fast she can pick things up.

[Mizzou211]

You're right Mark. Agree with everything in your list. Kids are SMART!

Young parents...understand this: Doing this is HARD and it takes EFFORT and INTENT.

Teach them to change a tire in an emergency. Don't solve their problems, but instead, teach them to THINK and PLAN and to NOT PANIC.

They'll amaze you with their abilities and capacity.

My son will be 17 in a few days and he's 6'4" and 225 lbs. I shake his hand, and hug and kiss him every day.

[ST8Bugging]

[TNRanger]

Agree with everything but #7. Too dirty and smelly for me
If I had a farm or a house in the country, it would probably be a different story.

[Mark Perry]

You're right Mark. Agree with everything in your list. Kids are SMART!

Young parents...understand this: Doing this is HARD and it takes EFFORT and INTENT.

Teach them to change a tire in an emergency. Don't solve their problems, but instead, teach them to THINK and PLAN and to NOT PANIC.

They'll amaze you with their abilities and capacity.

My son will be 17 in a few days and he's 6'4" and 225 lbs. I shake his hand, and hug and kiss him every day.

Now that all my kids are parents themselves we love the calls and texts asking us for advice on the little things...I think sometimes our kids truly felt we actually had a clue as to the "right" way to raise them.......we remind them that kids don't come with instructions and always stick to the basics such as a lot of love, a lot of laughing and a lot of just being there for them. The rest tends to work itself out.

[bdog7198]

Nice list, especially number 5. To many young men/women lack critical thinking skills. Only know what the books teach them, I am IT security those books are written for utopia's that do not exist. They need the ability to take in the relevant info, and determine the proper course of action for the situation.

[jimsch]

Great list for all to go by. Thanks Mark.

[yatesville88fan]

Great post Mark.

[188Musky]

Agree with everything but #7. Too dirty and smelly for me
If I had a farm or a house in the country, it would probably be a different story.

Sometimes you can make do with a turtle or a salamander or a fish or a snake.

Good list, Mark.

[Greywalls]

This should be a sticky. Excellent advice.

[Flashpoint]

So So So True!!!

[Coppermushroom]

Excellent list. It's amazing to me how much of our quality conversations happen on the deck of a bass boat, sitting in a duck blind, or splitting firewood together.

[Bassman Ia.]

We have a 46 year old and a 43 year old. Both have made it on their own. They both bought and paid for their own cars when they turned 16. Son owns a bar/grill, daughter has been in the insurance business for 20 years.

6 grandkids and we do spoil them

[RonCat]

Agree with everything but #7. Too dirty and smelly for me
If I had a farm or a house in the country, it would probably be a different story.

It is not about a specific animal, it's about teaching them responsibility.

[wareagle24]

Spot on Mark!! I only have one and he's 40 years old now but we are still best friends.