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  1. #1
    Member Razorbass P3's Avatar
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    Affordable Boat Care Act

    I'm ordering a new one today!!

    The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: "The affordable boat act" declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new boat, by April 2014. These "affordable" boats will cost an average of $54,000-$155,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.


    This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new laws ensures that every American can now have a "affordable" boat of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new boat. If you purchase your boat before the end of the year, you will receive 4 "free" life jackets; not including monthly usage fees.
    In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable boat, the costs of owning a boat will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who cant afford to maintain their boat will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parents boats to party on until they turn 27; then must purchase their own boat.
    If you already have a boat, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you cant). If you don't want or don't need a boat, you are required to buy one anyhow. If you refuse to buy one or cant afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment.
    Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert; ghettos; inner cities or areas with no access to lakes are not exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire are acceptable excuses for not using your boat.
    A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between the port, starboard or stern sides of a boat) will decide everything, including; when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your boat along with how many people can ride your boat and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their boat. They will also decide if your boat has out lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories,(like a $500 compass) or a newer and more expensive boat. Those that can afford yachts will be required to do so...its only fair. The government will also decide the name for each boat. Failure to comply with these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment.
    Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they and their families can obtain boats free, at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.


    First member of Kawasaki Outboard Prostaff

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  3. BBC SPONSOR tnsnow's Avatar
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    #2
    Oh so wrong but very funny.

    Born to fish, forced to work.

  4. Member
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    #3

  5. Ride & Decide! Gunnar's Avatar
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    #4




    Nothing Rides Like a Champion!


  6. TMG
    TMG is offline
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    #5
    "talking to you is like clapping with one hand"
    Anthrax

  7. Member TRYTOFISH's Avatar
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    #6

  8. Member Josh*'s Avatar
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    #7
    As a boat saleman...... I vote for you.

    Oh yea and IBTL.
    Sales Manager for Sunset Marine, formerly known as David Fritts Outdoors

  9. Bub
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    #8
    Love it!

    I wonder if certain "Cadillac boats" such as a fully rigged 21 foot ranger will be outlawed causing manufactures to only offer "cookie cutter" boats with no bells a whistles. Also, is everyone required to have a chart plotter GPS system, a ship to shore radio, and at least 2 150 hp motors even if they only use their boat for small electric only lakes?

  10. Member
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    #9
    IBTL...

  11. Sleeping with the fishes slonezp's Avatar
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    #10
    I tried to sign up for my new boat but the website was down.
    Life isn't fair



  12. Member blade1970's Avatar
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    #11

  13. Mr. Doucheaux Alan S's Avatar
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    #12
    Ha ha.
    Alan
    __________________________________________________ _________
    "Malo periculosam, libertatem quam quietam servitutem."
    Thomas Jefferson

  14. Member
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    Texarkana, Texas, north of I-30, 4 country songs before you get to the river.
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    #13
    Quote Originally Posted by slonezp View Post
    I tried to sign up for my new boat but the website was down.

  15. Moderator 200xp's Avatar
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    #14
    What we cannot obtain from intelligence, we can learn from experience.

  16. Member Hulkamaniac's Avatar
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    #15
    Quote Originally Posted by slonezp View Post
    I tried to sign up for my new boat but the website was down.

  17. Member
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    #16
    How tax credit will I get?

  18. Member AirForceAngler's Avatar
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    #17
    Sad but so funny! Jake will be here in a minute to explain why it's ok to have to pay for someone else's boat.

  19. 2007 Bass Cat Pantera IV
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    #18
    Adam that is funny as hell. Now get back to mounting animals so everybody can have a boat.

  20. Member southernoutcast's Avatar
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    #19
    Gene Shaw
    Anniston, AL

  21. Member
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    #20


    That's hilarious

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